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Home » Archives » May 2005

Saturday, May 28th

David Lynch's Weather Report

No really. Right here, in Quicktime (kinda slow loading). Finally, a way to make "marine layer dissipating, sunny and seventy" a little more dynamic.

For some reason I imagine it's going to be like Jack Nance talking about his dog in Wild at Heart:

"My dog barks some. Mentally you picture my dog, but I have not told you the type of dog which I have. Perhaps you even picture Toto, from 'The Wizard of Oz'. But I warn you, my dog is always with me. WOOF!


Posted By: Ian on 05.28.05 @ 08:02 AM EDT [link]


Thursday, May 26th

But Will It Work For Five Bucks An Hour?

Glad they're replacing all those pesky humans with someone who actually understands my feelings. Maybe they can use a system like this for the off-hours at the suicide hotline too...


Posted By: Ian on 05.26.05 @ 06:34 AM EDT [link]


Tuesday, May 24th

Death Penalty Okay In This Case

Wow. Never mind the possibility that he killed Lana Clarkson, Phil Spector should get the chair just for this hairdo. Hmm. On review, it looks like he already did...


Posted By: Ian on 05.24.05 @ 02:36 PM EDT [link]


Thursday, May 19th

May The Farce Be With You, Cuke Skywalker

Join the Organic Rebellion. Young Cuke Skywalker learns the ways of The Farm from Obi Wan Cannoli. From the people who brought you The Meatrix.


Posted By: Ian on 05.19.05 @ 03:44 PM EDT [link]


Wednesday, May 18th

Galloway Rips Congress A New One

If you missed George Galloway's performance before the U.S. congress yesterday defending his reputation against U.S. claims that he was involved in Oil For Food scandals, you missed one of the juiciest bits of senate testimony in years. There's a one hour video here (Real Format), best headline award goes to the NY Post, and The Guardian (as always) has some juicy stuff here, including an hilarious "behind-the-scenes" tidbit. Apparently Galloway said the following to the perpetually perspiring and hung-over Christopher Hitchens:

"You're a drink-soaked former Trotskyist popinjay. Your hands are shaking. You badly need another drink."

Who knows, maybe he's guilty, but until then he's my new political hero.


Posted By: Ian on 05.18.05 @ 11:03 AM EDT [link]


Tuesday, May 17th

Who Makes Movies? Fluffers Make Movies.

If you're tired of the MPAA telling you not to pirate movies right after you paid ten bucks to sit down and watch one, you might get a kick out of these parodies of the "Stuntmen Make Movies" clip that many of us have had to endure in theaters. Our personal fave: Fluffers Make Movies. Also check out: Script Doctors Make Movies or (attention Terry!) Zombies Make Movies. And while you're at it, check out our copyfight parodies on CafePress.


Posted By: Ian on 05.17.05 @ 12:39 AM EDT [link]


Monday, May 16th

Can We Godwin Our Own Blog?

For those of you who read blogs and don't know what Godwin's Law is (if you do know what it is, trust me, there are many users who don't), read this explanation before reading the rest of this post.

Now that we all know what we're talking about, consider this:

I recently submitted our page of copyfight parody images to BoingBoing.net for consideration. Cory Doctorow of BoingBoing quickly and politely replied, and informed me that although "This stuff is funny, Ian!" that he was "...uncomfortable with the Nazi stuff, though", adding: "I'm a believer in Godwin's Law and worry that the discreditation that accrues to its violators would outweigh the humor. Sorry."

Fair enough, and well said, Cory.

It got me thinking, though.
First of all, since the images in question only suggest nazism:

1.) There are no swastikas
2.) We refer to fascism, not dictatorial Nazism or Hitler
3.) The fairly reasonable implication made is that the parties in question may literally be a bit fascist in their view of intellectual property rights. (Specifically: that the public has none.)

Is it therefore truly worthy of invoking Godwin's Law? Perhaps more importantly, why is it considered somehow acceptable to use Stalinist images to make light of this topic, but not Hitlerian or Nazistic images? As many as SIXTY MILLION PEOPLE were killed during Stalin's reign, depending on who you believe, with a commonly accepted figure being around TWENTY million. Why is the Stalin/Communist comparison so much less offensive? There is no humor whatsoever in either of these horrifying historical periods, yet we can't sit around weeping for every atrocity committed throughout human history, we wouldn't have a moment left for living in general. Humans just seem to do that mass-slaughter thing on a regular basis, and you have to consider it just dumb luck if you live in a time and place where it's not going on...

So ANYONE, please post an explanation for me. I just don't get it. Really.


Posted By: Ian on 05.16.05 @ 10:12 AM EDT [link]


Saturday, May 14th

Microsoft Stealing Kids' Thoughts

Only a company like Microsoft could dream this up. Their U.K. short film competition Thought Thieves asks the people who are probably the biggest perpetrators of intellectual property theft to make a movie about why it's bad. The irony is compounded by this item in the terms & conditions:

Should I be selected as a finalist in this competition, I confirm the following:

7. I will formally licence on terms acceptable to Microsoft, all intellectual property rights in my film and agree to waive all moral rights in relation to my film if requested to do so. I understand that if I do not complete the necessary documentation by the stated date, my entry will be disqualified from the competition.


Posted By: Ian on 05.14.05 @ 10:58 PM EDT [link]


Thursday, May 12th

Paranoia: 100 Freedom: O

Well, congress passed the bill. So perhaps you'd like to learn a little about Biometrics, as the retinal scan can't be far behind. You might also want to watch THX 1138. Blessings of the state. Blessings of the masses. Consume. Be Happy.

Can anybody out there get me a job with the DHS?


Posted By: Ian on 05.12.05 @ 10:20 AM EDT [link]


Tuesday, May 10th

Senate To Vote On REAL I.D. Today

It may already be too late to impact the passing of this bill, but that's no reason to keep your mouth shut about it. You can still visit this page at EFF.ORG to easily send a message to your senator. After you customize your message, you're provided with a downloadable copy of the letter being sent. One of the scariest parts of this bill is the waiver that seems to give the Department of Homeland Security immunity from judicial oversight:

Section 102(c) of the Illegal Immigration Reform and Immigrant Responsibility Act of 1996 (8 U.S.C. 1103 note) is amended to read as follows:

`(c) Waiver-

`(1) IN GENERAL- Notwithstanding any other provision of law, the Secretary of Homeland Security shall have the authority to waive, and shall waive, all laws such Secretary, in such Secretary's sole discretion, determines necessary to ensure expeditious construction of the barriers and roads under this section.

`(2) NO JUDICIAL REVIEW- Notwithstanding any other provision of law (statutory or nonstatutory), no court, administrative agency, or other entity shall have jurisdiction--

`(A) to hear any cause or claim arising from any action undertaken, or any decision made, by the Secretary of Homeland Security pursuant to paragraph (1); or

`(B) to order compensatory, declaratory, injunctive, equitable, or any other relief for damage alleged to arise from any such action or decision.'.

Kind of scary. See you off the grid...


Posted By: Ian on 05.10.05 @ 09:42 AM EDT [link]


Monday, May 9th

SLOW DOWN! I'm Getting Dizzy...

If you ever feel like life's getting a little frantic, there's a reason. Worldometers.Info has a cool page of real-time displays of the occurrences of certain events around the world. For instance, in the time it takes you to read this, a couple thousand people went to a movie, and a million dollars were spent on the military. It's especially weird to look at the birth numbers climbing, and think about another human arriving in the world.


Posted By: Ian on 05.09.05 @ 10:28 AM EDT [link]


Friday, May 6th

Can I Wear A Tin Foil Hat For My National I.D. Photo?

Do we really want a government that gives itself a D+ in computer security holding all our personal data in one place?

If Americans don't speak up NOW, congress will pass a bill next week that craftily rolls a National I.D. card law into a bill authorizing more funds for U.S. troops in Iraq. This is not a partisan issue, it's a fundamental constitutional issue, and dirty sneaky politics as well.

If you care, visit EFF.ORG's web site to take some action, or locate your congressperson's contact info here. More useful info can be found at EPIC.ORG

You can also find some great instuctions for building an AFDB (Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie or "Tin Foil Hat" for you novices) HERE.


Posted By: Ian on 05.06.05 @ 12:11 AM EDT [link]


Wednesday, May 4th

Anybody Feel A Draft?

Yes, the military is overextended, according to a report presented to congress by General Richard Myers. Maybe that's why recruiters are helping kids lie, cheat, and forge their way into military service.


Posted By: Ian on 05.04.05 @ 08:36 AM EDT [link]


Tuesday, May 3rd

Big Brother's Ad Agency

Well hello, uncle Nielsen... If you saw Minority Report and liked the idea of those personalised ads, well, we're one step closer thanks to ACNielsen. Check out Project Apollo, which will track your family's every consumer move with a Portable People Meter. Wow. These people actually think there's a direct cause and effect relationship between ads and purchasing. Example:

"While watching television with the family that evening, a commercial for the Navigator airs, prompting a weekend visit to the Lincoln showroom by our couple the following Saturday. With Apollo, the connection from exposure to action will be clear, direct and measurable, informed by a robust collection of rich consumer profiles contributed by panel members."

When they say "robust collection of rich consumer profiles", do they mean "rich consumer" or "rich profile"? Hmmm.


Posted By: Ian on 05.03.05 @ 09:07 AM EDT [link]